The second stage of the grief cycle is Emotional Release. This is the ability to get rid of those bottled up feelings by crying, by screaming and yes, even by laughing…whatever positive manifestations that allow a release of emotions. It’s okay to cry…it’s okay to laugh…it’s okay to yell at the world. You need to let it out. It’s not disrespectful for children to laugh or to want to go outside to play…they have their own ways of coping.
It’s important to know that even though we will all experience these stages of grief, we will experience them at our own speed and maybe more than one stage at a time. It’s also important to know that it may take more than a couple of years to work your way through a “good grief” cycle. If you have ever heard of the phrase “bad grief”, it would relate to becoming stuck in one stage and not being able to move on.
The third stage of the grief cycle is Depression. This is the stage when you start to realize the impact of the loss. This is the stage when you don’t want to get out of bed in the morning or once you get the kids off to school, you want to go back to bed and stay there. What’s really important to know in this stage is that the people around you really do care. So if you are reading this, and you know someone who is grieving, let me tell you that a phone call, a visit or a card are all good things. Don’t stay away because you don’t think that you know the right things to say. Sometimes you just need to listen. Sometimes it’s not what you say that means so much, but just the fact that you cared enough to come.
Until next week, Marc
