And so the question was raised “I’m nervous going to a funeral home when someone dies. What am I supposed to do?” This is an answer from a lady who lost her husband…
The best thing to do at a funeral is just go. I didn’t know the majority of the people who were at my husbands funeral, and yet, the fact that they came for him made me feel so good. Especially those work friends he’d talked about but that I’d never met. And my kids friends, and their parents! He wasn’t my kids father, but that my kids friends came to support them was amazing to me too.
What to wear? I don’t remember what anyone wore, I know I wasn’t offended by anything out of the ordinary, but then again, I was too busy with my own thoughts to worry if Aunt Tooties dress was too short or if Uncle Don went out and bought a new pair of dress pants.
People came to view the body, some touched, some didn’t, but that was ok too. I held his hand the whole time. At one point, a woman I don’t even know (part of his family, great aunt? Cousin?) came in with a camera. I saw her quickly put it in her purse, embarrassed. I asked, would you like to take a picture? She said yes, and we had a nice conversation about how some people think it’s weird or disrespectful, but I’ve got funeral pictures of family back to when cameras were first invented.
I know I’m just one person, and I know all people are different, but those are just my opinions. I think it’s better to come and support then to stay at home. The family might not even realize you were there, but having people there is important.
How sad if everyone was too afraid to go, and so no one came?
Until next week,
Marc
